I Had The Post-Wedding Blues

brideA few weeks ago some friends of mine got married.  They married in a different state, and since we (and many of their friends and family) were unable to attend they live-streamed their wedding ceremony for all of us to be able to watch online.  It was wonderful.  After the wedding, however, I felt a little bummed out.  I was bummed out that we were missing the rest of the festivities, but that wasn’t the feeling… It was the same feeling I had after my own wedding.

I was just like most little girls; I dreamed about my wedding for as long as I could remember.  My husband proposed in June, but I had always wanted a Spring wedding so we set the date for the end of March.  I had 10 months to plan my wedding, which was great financially;  Things could be purchased/paid for a little at a time and we could save up money for the honeymoon.  It was also nice because I didn’t feel like I had forgotten anything that I wanted to make my big day everything I dreamed of (with-in budget of course).  However, after planning and anticipating and focusing on the wedding for all of those months, the wedding day itself was over in a few short hours.  Of course, my wedding was amazing;  The ceremony (though long) was exactly as I had hoped it would be, the reception was perfect, I felt beautiful and I was blissfully happy.

sadBut after we got back from our 10 day honeymoon in Maui I was hit hard with the post-wedding blues.  There was nothing left to plan, nothing left to anticipate about my wedding day, and I knew I’d never again have a wedding; that part of my life that I’d dreamed of for the past 22 years was over with.  I watched my wedding video over and over again, spent hours on the wedding websites I’d relied on to help me plan my wedding, and overall just felt seriously depressed.  I thought something must be wrong with me.  How could I be depressed when I was married to the man of my dreams and we had started a life together?  I knew it had something to do with the wedding itself and not with him, but I felt horribly guilty.  And then I found it; a board on one of the wedding websites about post-wedding blues.  It was there I saw that I was dealing with something so many women deal with; I was normal!!  I read about how other women were feeling, what they were going through and what they were doing to help themselves feel better.

Little by little I started to feel okay again and I realized I had new things to look forward to, like having a family and buying a house.  The post-wedding blues left me and I was okay.  As I mentioned before, occasionally I get that feeling again, but it’s momentary.  Then I remember the bliss of that day and where my life has gone since then, and I am left with no other feeling than pure joy.

If you’re one who is experiencing the post-wedding blues, there are tons of sites you can find to help you overcome.  Some offer support from women (and men) going through the same thing you are, some offer suggestions on how to fill your time and replace that feeling of sadness with excitement and motivation. Search those out and find your happiness again!

 

 

Comments

  1. This is a thought-provoking post. I’d never given the idea of post wedding blues much thought. Mine wasn’t this enormous affair and I remember being so excited to move onto the next phase. I’m glad you posted about this and helped people know they’re not alone in this.

  2. I felt the exact same way, years ago, when I got married. All the months of planning ahead, and then the wedding itself was over in just a few hours. But there is so much to look forward to down the road! Marriage is just the beginning!

  3. Laura Grace Andry says:

    I felt relieved when my wedding was over an excited to start my new life. But I also planned my wedding while student teaching and was a bit overwhelmed.

  4. Wow, I guess I hadnt thought about that. I was seriously so relaxed about the whole affair while others around me were stressed so I was excited to not deal with their stress anymore 🙂

  5. I’m not married yet but i’m sure when i do i’ll experience this. I experience the blues after a major event that i’ve been looking forward or preparing for is done. like a vacation, even being pregnant. It goes away but when I feel blue I try to schedule things to keep me busy on days that I know i’ll have nothing to do and that helps 🙂

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