A Plea To Clothing Designers Everywhere

This mommy has been in dire need of alone time, so today my wonderful husband let me escape for a few hours to do just that.  I decided to go do something else I’ve been needing to do for a while; get some new clothes.  I know you mommies can relate to me when I say I so rarely get new clothes for myself.  I’m always either buying for everyone else, or when I do finally get something for myself I end up feeling guilty about the money spent and I return everything I bought.  ‘Not today’, I told myself.  ‘Today I will buy myself a few things and I will not take them back’, (plus my husband told me I was in big trouble if I went shopping and didn’t come back with something for myself).  So off I went, cash in my wallet and eager to shop, alone, for myself!

shoppingI walked into the store with a bounce in my step and began digging through rack after rack of colorful dresses and tops, grabbing anything and everything that even minutely looked cute or comfortable- Why not? I was kidless!  It didn’t take long before my cart was piled high, so I decided it was time to quit digging and go try some things on.  Since only 8 items were allowed into the fitting room at a time, (and since I was alone), I went through the obnoxious process of having to put back on my own clothes and gather up all of my stuff to go out and trade for 8 more items and then go back in and search for another dressing room that was open, over and over and over again. A minor annoyance (and far better than trying to shop with 4 kids), but… well that’s not what this post is about so I’ll move on…

It didn’t take long before I was totally bummed out, not because the things didn’t fit (or because I kept having to take off and put on my socks and boots and jeans and sweater over and over and over again), but because everything was so ridiculously inappropriate. Ridiculously!  And this isn’t the first time this has happened; A few weeks ago I made the same attempt at shopping for myself, (not kidless and not as much time, but an attempt nonetheless), and was met with the same misfortune, though I figured it was the store I was at. Clearly not so…

Here’s where my plea comes in, so listen up:

I am a mommy.  I have morals and a sense of decency.  I do not want my chest spilling out of even one item of clothing I wear, let alone all of them.  I do not want my outfit to be so tight that you can see every curve or love handle (I’ve had 4 kids, people), or show the outline of my undergarments that I will be wearing when I’m out in public.  I do not want my clothing to be see-through, and I certainly don’t want to pay money for your apparel and then have to go buy more to cover up and hide the areas that your apparel doesn’t cover just to make said apparel modest and appropriate.  I DO want to set an example for my children, follow the laws of God in being modest, and honor my husband in leaving certain parts of my body for his eyes only.

Why, oh why, can’t you allow me that?!  I honestly tried on over 50 different dresses and tops; I gave it a fair try and tried on different brands and styles, but after nearly 3 hours I finally left with 1 dress, 1 top, and a very bad taste in my mouth.  The dress I purchased I almost returned because, as I mentioned before, I will have to wear a camisole underneath to keep my chest properly covered.  NOT happy.

In addition to begging for myself and other modest mommies, I am begging for the sake of our children.

Walking past the juniors section was sickening to me.  I saw no pair of shorts long enough to cover an entire cheek.  And the tops… Oh, the tops…

I’m at the unfortunate age where- at some stores- the women’s tops are far too old lady for me, and while I feel too old lady to be shopping in the juniors department, I’m more likely to find something there that appeals to my style so I go for it. I was sickened to see shirts with lace as the entire back piece of the top, or a neckline cut down so low there’s no way to keep a training bra from peeking out.  When I tried on what I thought were safe, plain ol’ t-shirts, I could hardly peel them off, they were so tight.  HOW is this appropriate for young girls? Is this really what we want our daughters wearing? I can tell you I certainly don’t, and I am terrified of the day when I have to deal with this.  I’m already sickened with some of the bathing suits, dresses and other apparel I find in the girls’ section of the stores, but at least there are options!

Don’t even get me started on how much I hate that we can’t even walk through the grocery store without my kids, especially my boys, having to see far more of a woman’s body than they should at their young ages…

Please, let’s let them keep their innocence for as long as possible!innocence

I think I’ve made my point clear here, but just to be sure, I’d like to repeat myself and beg a bit more…

Please, when you sit behind your design desk and start thinking up the next thing you’ll send to the factories to make in mass quantities, remember there are people out there who would like to leave something to the imagination.  There are young kids out there who are already losing their innocence in this crazy world and need no further help from you.  Please know that there are a good number of us out there (probably more than even I would think) who will gladly spend our money on your clothing if you make it appropriate.

For now, I’m off to drown my frustrations in a bag of chocolate chips while I search to find a store/company I can feel good giving my business to.


  1. Preach it mama! I totally agree with you and am always finding myself shaking my head when looking for clothing at the store. So frustrating.

  2. I couldn’t agree with you more! I have the hardest time finding shirts that aren’t too tight or aren’t too low cut.

  3. joanna garcia says

    amen!!! i thought it was just me!! i totally agree!

  4. So true! I’d add in those horrible sheer fabrics that seem to be everywhere this spring.

  5. teresa herrera-honores says

    omg i thought i was the only one! LOL my hubby also makes me shop for myself cause us moms do not do that! LOL i totally agree with you!

  6. It would also be nice if the clothes we buy didn’t fall apart after a couple of washes. Ugh.

  7. I have the same problem. I never shop for myself and the few times I try there is nothing appropriate to wear.

  8. Felicia Aguilar says

    I feel the same way about clothing stores! I’m about to be 22, and I don’t have any kids, but I also do not want my chest hanging out or my bra being visible to the world. I absolutely hate when you see something that looks cute, try it on, and because it’s too small you try a size up, and then that size shows all your undergarments because it’s way too big! I definitely feel the same about things being more in my taste in the juniors department also, but they really do make everything so form fitting. I tend to always buy plain (colored) t-shirts from Target in the Juniors section and usually they fit well, but everything else is a gamble.

  9. I know exactly what you mean. My daughter is just over a year old and I am still wearing my long maternity tank tops under a lot of shirts just to keep my stomach covered (I’m only 5’4 and shouldn’t have to worry about a normal sized shirt being long enough to fit my torso). Even shopping for basic tees (something I wouldn’t think has to be so “sexy”), is almost impossible because they are all so sheer.

  10. Well said, I share your frustration.

  11. I share your frustrations! Thank you for putting your words so eloquently…

  12. Amen sister! I refuse to purchase inappropriate clothing.

  13. Christine H says

    With what stores are selling, I thought I was the only one who wanted to stay modest. I have found some great online stores that specialize in modest AND stylish clothing.

  14. Paula Wilson says

    Amen, Amen and Amen!!!! I do not want low cut cleavage showing shirts and I am bummed to see that this year apparently short shorts are “in” again. They can be modest and still look classy and stylish.

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